2015…..Breathing

So far, I’ve made an important decision regarding my dating life this year. Since I can’t decipher whether or not I will ever get my fairy tale ending, I’ve decided that dating is extremely overrated at this point in my life. I’m taking some time off. I’ve decided to add and subtract from my list of Prince Charming characteristics in the meantime, just in case. I’ve learned a lot over the past couple years and my experiences have proven to really highlight what I am looking for, or should I say, NOT looking for in a mate.

1. He must be sane. (Probably goes without saying, but honestly….I’ve met some interesting people recently!)
2. He must be kind and sincere.
3. Funny.
4. Patient.
5. Chivalrous.
6. Smart/educated.
7. Patient.
8. Confident but modest.
9. Great with kids.
10. Open and willing to communicate.
11. Tall.

So far, that’s where I’m at. Like I said…not sure he exists….
But I have plenty of time to consider this while I spend my weekends reading, watching reruns of New Girl and redoing that ugly bookshelf in my room. And I’m okay with that. Finally.

Love and Grattitude….Amy

Epic Love Story

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It occurred to me after tossing and turning awhile in my tangled blankets this morning that part of my issue is that not only do I want an epic love story, but I expect one.

You know, the kind you hear about mostly on television and in fairy tales. The kind when two people meet and they just know they’re destined to be together. They seemingly read each other’s minds without fail and everyone around them talks about how they are so perfect for each other. Blah, blah, blah.

Is it true? Does this actually happen in real life? Have I been fooling myself all this time? A part of me, the divorced adult single mom part, thinks I’m completely crazy for thinking this way. Another part of me, the stubborn child that survived, she thinks that I shouldn’t let the world’s bitterness corrupt me. So, I sit in the middle and listen to them fight. Needless to say, neither appears to be winning the battle at the moment.

What do you think? Do you agree with divorced adult single mom or with the stubborn child? Do you know of any of these real life “epic love stories?” Do tell.

Hope your day is thoughtful and productive.

Love and Grattitude….Amy

Preparing for 2015

What a year it’s been! 2014 rates up there as one of the most thought provoking and learning years of my life. Who would have thought age 37 would be such a defining age for me? I certainly didn’t!

A divorce from a cheating husband in February. A new running regime. A break up from a rebound relationship in October. A few other dates here and there, but one thing has become clear to me, I need some work in this area. And not just a little bit here and there. We’re talking a pretty good sized overhaul.

If you notice, the highlights I tread upon are namely relationship related. What is that about?? As I sit here quietly on my bright red couch contemplating this, I realize I have actually become one of those needy, desperate women. It took my last date to bluntly point it out and I have to admit I was really in denial when I initially thought about it. I mean seriously, I don’t need anyone!! But then it occurred to me, why am I so quick to view how every date would fit into my life? Why do I feel the need to have everyone I date fall madly¬† in love with me immediately?

Have I actually become the proverbial needy single mom?¬† I have a full-time job, a rented 3 bedroom house that has plenty of space, a vehicle, three beautiful and strong daughter’s, lots of hobbies and interests, great friends. So what’s the problem? What am I so badly lacking? Is it self-esteem? Is it that somehow society has brainwashed me into thinking I need a man? Is it wanting sex but not wanting to feel like a slut? Is it just companionship? Maybe a little bit of all of these.

I guess 2015 should be the time to figure it out. For my own sanity. (And that of any future potential dates) Time to get it together. So, to everyone out there with some of these same issues and who dares follow me in my quest for a healthy relationship, cheers to 2015!

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Love and Grattitude….Amy